Good night. How are you?
Today the weather is very cold. But that’s not what I want you to know.
I’ve made a big mistake, isn’t? I’m the useless that had become a burden for you, isn’t it? I’m someone who can’t be what you want, isn’t? I’m someone who doesn’t know how to repay your sacrifice, isn’t it?
The world is too cruel. Too cruel for the cheap stuff like me. I feel hated by you. I am who can only be dropped, stepped on, thrown away, and ignored.
I’m so sorry. I’m really sorry with the tears coming out of my heart.
I’m sorry to have been born as your daugther. Sorry for making you give birth to someone like me. Sorry for making you give all the things that I want. I shouldn’t have to be born into this world. I’m sorry.
I should have been erased and forgotten. But I could not stop myself from crying. It’s painful, really. Unknowingly my heart hurts alone.
I’m sorry to make you suffer. I’m sorry to make you work hard just to keep me breathing. I realized that I shouldn’t even exist. I‘m really sorry for that.
I couldn’t tell you I loved you.
I couldn’t hug you all I wanted.
When the stars fall.
Silent in the night air.
I wish I’ll disappear from your life J
Malang, 5 Juli 2014. 21.34 PM